The Bruising of an Ego

Sometimes, I am appalled by the naivete of my youth. Read on, and you'll see why.

When I was a young lad--no older than 11 or 12, I used to have a crush on these two girls at church who shall remain nameless. (Hint--they look a lot alike)....So, in the mid 90's, The Pathfinders had a Camporee trip to Jamaica (The island, not the Avenue). It was fun...i would wear sunglasses at night-time because i thought I was cool. Yeah, I was an interesting kid. So at some point during this trip, somebody came up to me and said "Hey Matt, guess what? *** and **** both have a crush on you."

So I say "Is that so? heh heh," I go into my tent, lay down on the floor and kick my feet up on my duffle bag plotting how i'm going to holler at them both. Now, I was a nerd until i started high school, and I had no experience in this field (I was 11)....which my next actions will show.

Anyway, so we're on the bus going to Negril Falls, and I (cocky as ever) confidently think to myself "Heh heh, let me give them BOTH the sexy eye" so.......

I stared at them BOTH with the "You're mine" face...for the entire ride to and from Negril Falls, and they kept giggling and looking at eachother and giggling some more. So I'm thinking "Heh heh, They're happy I'm noticing them..Score one for Big Daddy"....It didn't cross my mind that they could have simply been laughing at me........poor me...

So, when we got back to camp, I started to make my way over to them (I don't know how i planned on hollering at them BOTH, but hey--what did I know?)...and their other SISTER came out of nowhere and stood in front of me, blocking my path (I guess I was expected) and said the following words "Look, my sisters do not like you. You are too young, and you are not their type. You were told they liked you as a result of a failed blackmail attempt"........

...OUCH!
...OUCH!!
...FRIGGIN OUCH!!!

At that point, the ground began spinning, and I felt a wave of heat roll over me as embarrassment flooded my veins. The only reply I could utter was "Huh? Me like your sisters? Naw they're too old for me" (Of course i didn't think that she knew I was lying becasue i was headed STRAIGHT FOR THEM before she intercepted me harder than a Favre pass). For the rest of the trip, I made sure to avoid the both of them, and they would still occasionaly look and laugh.

I'm pretty sure I am the ONLY one who remember that all of this happened. Why? My Ego is still healing to this day, and i'm in my mid-twenties.

(Shakes head, turns off light, and walks away)